i feel like im living in a tunnel.
this is all so surreal.
ive been feeling things very strongly
and find myself reviewing things,
but trying not to obsess,
cause thats just a death spiral
in these here times…
im frequently alone
and have long since stopped dreaming romantically.
though i find myself desiring friendship intensely.
i think about those i love.
why i love them,
or if theres a why…
i miss those i cannot see
and wish i could make their lives sweeter.
i realize again and again each day,
how much loving and giving
does for me
and am grateful for my wide and crazy family
in all the stages and places they are.
i am one, that never stops loving
and while that is painful at times,
i believe it is worth it.
if only to have that constant space
of perfect filled warmth
even when some of that love
is only in mourning.
i love hard
i love deep
i love still.
and i love after.