Monthly Archives: December 2019

im not sure what im doing exactly, but im tapering down. theres no point in my feelings. theres certainly no point in sharing them. even if to no one. im not that bright apparently, and i need to be shown … Continue reading →

im not supposed to be there anyway. or anyplace else for that matter. so it just is what it is. i guess so.

when everyone goes away and its just us small people over here, it gets kind of frightening, hearing the thump thump thump of my broken heart so loudly.

i feel a bit like corduroy. all i want is a friend. i know what it feels like, im sure i do. i lay awake in bed at night and think, that maybe tomorrow someone will pass by and back … Continue reading →

i dont know how to do any of this. i think i might be crazy. theres this tug of war where i start doubting everything and this uneven space where what i knew to be true yesterday, might no longer … Continue reading →

im stuck and attached and alone. all at once. and the hug was so worth it. and the wine was delicious. and each movement was owned by a running slide of the other third playing my pieces and laughing along.

i pray i dont wake up   saturday morning.   alone in a basement   with a different language spoken   and no one to bear weight   with people i dont know,   and all that i have,   … Continue reading →

i can work the whole week and fix other peoples destructive steps and make everything ok for everybody always. and then, when everyone goes to see the fireworks the party the sunrise and rest.. i, am left alone in maids … Continue reading →

i think i might explode. i did earlier a bit. but i think the fault line is wearing thin. i wonder what that will look like. and who will get most covered by the detritus. the scary thing is, that … Continue reading →

i have so little to say to the general public. im so tired. there’s so many people. and nothing ever for me.