Monthly Archives: November 2019

sometimes i try so hard not to think that my brain ceases to function at all. im just really tired of crying. that’s all.

i come home to such loneliness having acted the part the whole goddamn day full of thankfulness for little and overwhelmed with the enormous task of making everyone feel like im so happy to be there. and now i read … Continue reading →

im crying. im a little drunk. and i dont know who to call. or write. im so alone these days. so separate. and i just really need to be held. im so lost. and i dont understand me. and i … Continue reading →

i dont know what it means. because i understand nothing. i am already two toes in. but i cant be tortured, or held at bay, i wont. i am me. and nobody knows who that is. and im not even … Continue reading →

because it doesnt really matter. and thats the truth. it always has been. none of it matters. nothing changes. and so i go on still.  

you know when something’s over and done and you you know it’s never going to be again… and you spend time erasing and moving things around and changing the course of your heart and altering the waves in your head… … Continue reading →

its like im making these decisions i dont want to make. and all i end up with, is its time to stop being me. i think ive given more than enough time and more than enough skin to a game … Continue reading →

im in so much pain and nothing i do takes it away, cause nothing i do matters and everyone else always has the upper hand. it’s up to them. they get to decide. i never have the power and am … Continue reading →

so prolific is this pain. it’s like skin sloughing off.. im dizzy, and weak, and have cried so much in the last two days that my eyes are burning constantly. i am in so much need and so much agony … Continue reading →