i can’t sleep.

and my mind doesn’t stop.

i wonder if i’ll ever be able

to breathe again.

my feet are heavy

i am soft

my body is hurt

and i have just shrunken.

the silence is deafening

and the clouds are dull,

and thoughts get stuck in my throat

all the endless time.

i only talk about the woods now,

I never go.

everything’s different

and i am so weak.

my eyes feel sad,

my heart actually hurts,

i cry a lot

and i have no answers.

ive made uninformed decisions

and swept up the pieces myself,

they were mostly me anyway-

except for the ones i pray will heal.

this has taught me truths.

ugly ones.

and i wonder how long

before i mirror

just that.

i don’t really want anyone

to hold my hand.

i ignore calls

and hide in shroud.

i am still.

i am casted.

but for no good reason

at all.