so much pain.

so much tired.

i cant change enough

to be

what anyone

will ever

want.

i just need to disappear

cause i dont like

to look at myself,

and i dont like

to feel,

and i just want to hang my hat up

and stop

breathing

and stop trying

cause i am just

not worth

enough.

i see that

so clearly

it almost makes me

want to go back..

and bow my head

and bend over

and cover it all up

and accept the collar,

the earring,

the brand,

and cut away

this impoverished soul

so this dented ego

could never grow,

and id be exactly what you wanted

and id never be me

and that would be just

perfect.

cause i,

am an utter

waste.